It was raining blood again. Not uncommon on the plane of fear but it just made everyone’s mood gloomier.
Here we were again on our third attempt at Cazic Thule, the lord of the plane of fear. Our guild leaders had to practically get on their knees to beg the raiding council on our Everquest server for this opportunity. The raid council was a group that controlled what guilds went where for special encounters like this. They scheduled you and denied you as they saw fit. In essence they ran the server. Plane of fear was an older raid. The top guilds had moved on to newer, bigger and better raids. Yet they refused to relinquish any control. They were adamant that any guild that failed a raid on three separate dates would be banned from raiding anymore.
Our little guild (only about 30 members) had attempted this raid twice before and had failed miserably both times and it looked like this was going no better. We had already been wiped out twice tonight and everyone was getting tired. The basic problem was that we were not causing sufficient damage. None of our guildies were high level or had special equipment. Whatever combination or tactic we tried just wasn’t working.
We had too many healers that night so I was running on a friend’s account and using her enchanter. Our clerics and healers sounded out a warning. They were running low on magic and could not keep up their healing and protection. We had to prepare. This meant that non essential guild mates would camp, or log out. They would wait offline for five or so minutes and then collect the bodies of those that had stayed behind fighting. The fighting would be over in less than a minute and everyone left behind would be massacred. The five minute rule was just to make sure no monsters hung around waiting for people to come back in. The survivors would then resurrect and try again.
Only in this case it didn’t look likely that there would be another attempt. It was late, everyone was despondent, just a general feeling of futility all around. We would fail our third attempt. We would be banned from all the higher level content. We would be a disgraced guild. Might as well quit the game.
I logged out as ordered and waited watching the clock on the monitor. 1 minute, despodent, 2 minutes, angry, 3 minutes…. Hell with it, going back in and going to go out fighting.
The loading screen was exceptionally slow. Explosions and noises all around me. I walked into the middle of a battlefield. They were still fighting! Someone was particularly stubborn or angry or both but they had held on. I threw myself into the fight.
Other guildies started logging back in. Apparently I wasn’t the only one disgusted at the thought of quitting the fight. If it was possible for a computer generated character to look nonplussed then that described Cazic Thule at that moment. The 30 foot tall god of fear seemed immobile and didn’t know what to do. This wasn’t going according to script.
Total confusion. Healers and magicians, out of magic, going in and attacking with staves, daggers, or fists. A tooth and nail fight. No strategy, no tactics, just do more damage. We counted off the percentages, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1….A small earth shattering thud as Cazic finally fell.
After raid chores. resting up the healers and resurrecting the dead, policing up loot and distribution of the same. Taking pictures atop the giant god’s carcass. Proof of our victory.
Not the biggest victory in the world, not even in the make believe world of Everquest, it hardly got a notice in the raid council. But we had done it. No one that had been in that raid that night had logged out without a feeling of achievement.
That was the turning point for our guild. We then went through a year long tear through the higher level raids. Ripping apart enemy after enemy with a furious energy born from that desperate night’s battle. We became more professional, and if not revered well at least respected. I would eventually become top healer in the guild and was ranked (for a short time) as one of the better healers on the server.
A small victory yes but something that I still remember fondly. What do I take away from it to the real world picture? Mainly that I keep trying. No matter how hopeless, pointless, and futile the fight is. I just don’t quit. I’ve written before that I sometimes need to know when to quit but really, this is the only real strength I have.
Maybe I should embrace that.
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